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Just DO It!

Posted May 19, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

Single wheelchair athlete in action during a marathon.I meet people almost every day who have incredible dreams of great worth. They research what it would take to accomplish it. They talk to experts in that field and get tips and pointers. They pray or consult professionals.

Then it happens. They just repeat the process. Somewhere along the journey, they jumped right onto a carousel and just keep going around in circles. Why? Well, there are several reasons.

It’s comfortable. Staying in the exploration phase keeps you safe and snuggly. No turtle ever had to stick his neck out as long as he stayed inside is nice, hard shell.

It’s familiar. You know what to do. Google has become your best friend. You get encouragement and positive affirmation from those2036_bmxyou query. That releases the feel good chemicals in your brain.

There’s no risk. When you’re going around in circles not really moving anywhere, there is absolutely no risk. And if you don’t risk anything, you may not win, but you think you won’t lose.

It’s free. Advice and opinions are plentiful and you can gorge yourself on an elephant’s worth without even pulling out your credit card. It’s like millions of free movies you can watch 24/7 with an $8.00 Netflix account.

Almost makes circling on the colorful horse inviting, doesn’t it? But here’s the thing. At some point, the ride will end. It always does and you’ll stumble off to the exact same spot as where you got on, only now you’re dizzy and disoriented.

woman sailing 01You have total and absolute control over your actions. You can start living your dream today. Yes, any wise journeyman will do your research and count the cost. But don’t keep counting the beans when you should be throwing them in the pot and cooking them.

 Sometimes others can tell if you’re riding the merry-go-round of procrastination but many times, only you know. Deep down in your heart, the truth is there. If you need years to research, train and execute your dream, so be it.

If you’re circling the park, get off your carossel high horse and JUST DO IT! Don’t go around another time. Get off and go somewhere!

Do you feel like you’re not getting anywhere? What’s causing it for you? Share it here!

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Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Posted May 16, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

Colorado Springs and Appalacia 016Yesterday while hiking in the forests of Appalacia, I found a huge spruce pine tree that was literally growing out of the rocks. It had navigated tons of shelf rock and stood among the tallest trees in that part of the mountain.

I was amazed. I began to wonder how it was able to do that. I recorded a video with the answer:

 

 http://youtu.be/75gQdzPgMZU

Many times in life you find yourself between a rock and a hard place. You feel you may not even survive, let along thrive. Yet, you were created to do just that. It’s not easy. I’m sure if that spruce could talk, he’d tell you some stories of suffering, frustration, discouragement and ultimately, rising above his challenges.

 

 

Enjoy the video.

Do you feel like you’re between a rock and a hard place? Share it here.

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[Podcast] Episode 7: Podcasting: How Audio Messages Will Help you Find Your Voice, and Your Clients

Posted May 15, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

microphone

 


Today’s podcast is about, well, podcasting. As you’ll hear, I wasn’t always such a raving fan of podcasting. I’m a bit resistant when it comes to new technology but once I finally realized the huge benefit of podcasting, I jumped in with both feet.

Enjoy!

Show Notes:

Episode 007 Show Notes

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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5 Steps to Exploring Your Perfect Career

Posted May 13, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

Little Girl on RoadYou may be in a job you don’t like. Okay, I was being diplomatic. Let’s face it. You hate it. It’s a drudgery to drag yourself out of bed each morning. You live for paychecks and paid time off. I know many women like that. That’s why I became a women’s entrepreneurial coach.

Perhaps you know your days are numbered at your current employer but you don’t know what you’d like to do with the rest of your life. You fear that going to work for another employer is jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. But you have to do something. Life is flying by.

Below are suggestions I have for you that will help you in your search for your new career. These really apply to anyone, but particularly entrepreneurial women.

1) Determine what you do that makes you truly happy. Sounds overly simple, yet so many worker bees are so focused on their job for their employer, they don’t take the time to explore it. This is action oriented. Sitting in the recliner with a bowl of popcorn watching reruns of Amos and Andy does not suffice. 

2) Think of ways to make money at what truly makes you happy. Love to play tennis and help people? Well, youDream Road could teach or coach tennis. Love to wood carve but don’t think anyone would buy your trinkets? There’s always a market somewhere. Hey, if rednecks can build a Duck Dynasty  from duck calls, you could sell your carvings.

3) Figure out what a day or week would be like working in your dream career. It might be helpful to talk to those already in the field. Before I became a coach, I spoke to entrepreneurial coach, Rhonda Hess. I really understood what I was getting myself into. So will you.  If your dream career involves a store or office, make arrangements to shadow someone doing what you want to do.

4) Make a list of pros and cons. Being your own boss might be appealing to you. Not having group health insurance may not. Be careful not to allow these to scare you off from thinking about doing your own thing. Clearly, you want a change. This is just a count the cost and know what you’re up against exercise. You’ll go in with eyes wide open.

COMPASS-AND-NOTEBOOK1.jpg5) Settle on Something. Unless your entrepreneurial dream is to own your own dry cleaning business, most likely your business will evolve. No doubt you’ve got at least a billion great ideas for what you want to accomplish. You have to start somewhere or you’ll start nowhere. So, you must settle on a place to start. You won’t be locked into doing that one thing for the rest of your career. It’s just a place to line up and begin your new career.

Really take the time to go through these. Give them some thought. Keep a notebook or journal. Taking steps in the direction of your dreams will boost your morale and help the day job be more tolerable. It will also gear up your heart, mind and soul to transition into your dream career. Go ahead. What are you waiting for?

What is your dream career? Are you having trouble figuring out what it is? Share it here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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5 Reasons Why You Should NOT Quit!

Posted May 10, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

In a previous blog post, Five Reasons Why People Quit,  I talked about the five reasons people quit pursuing their dreams. Today, I want to flip the coin and discuss the other side. In my blog post, Three Feet From Gold, I talk about how close a person may be to their dream when they abandon it.

It’s sad, really, but fortunately you don’t have to quit. In fact, most of the time, you should NOT quit. Here are five reasons why I believe this.

1) You may be inches away from a breakthrough. History has proven that many of the greatest successes have occurred because dreamers hung on just a tiny bit longer than those who quit.

2) Quitting sucks energy. You may be exhausted from all the effort you put into your dream, but with little or no positive results. You think you’ll feel better by stopping but that just won’t happen. You’ll actually feel more emotionally exhausted than ever.

3) Winners never quit. Winners may lose but they will never, never, never quit. They will dig in their heels and struggle to the bitter end. They truly understand it’s not over until it is.

4) You’ll miss out on lessons. Every person who has tried and not succeeded on the first try gained invaluable information that ultimately caused them to succeed. If you quit, that information will be lost and the world will be without your brilliance.

5) It becomes a habit. Once you start down that slippery slope, you’ll gain momentum. The only problem, it’s in the wrong direction. It’s fast and as you click off each inch of your downward spiral, you have no choice but to repeat your actions, over and over again.

Here’s how it works with most. You give up and abandon the pursuit of your dream. At first, you feel relieved. After all, you’ve worked really hard for a long time. But as you take time to enjoy your surroundings with the extra time you suddenly have on your hands, it begins to sink in. You’ve just chained yourself to that unfulfilling life you were trying to get out of. Eventually, you come face to face with the reality that you gave up your ticket out of your humdrum life by giving up your dream.

Quitting is not something that you will ever be happy with when it comes to pursuing your dream. If you quit, you’ll have a life of fulfillment and regret. Living your dream is a whole lot more fun. Not to mention way too important to remain unlived!

Have you ever quit pursuing your dream? What led you to that? Did you resist the temptation to quit? How? Share it here!

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Today, Trust in the Nature of YOU

Posted May 9, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.
CRANE5One morning I sat on my deck overlooking the lake as central Florida woke up to a Sunday. I watched as a lily white whooping crane spread his massive wings, fly out over the water and bring back a little fish. It was comical how it slithered down his narrow throat.

A white ibis rooted out grub worms with his long, slender bill while a young squirrel hung to an oak tree enjoying his morning acorns. In the distance, a black cormorant walked to the shoreline underwater, then spread his massive black wings in the sun to dry. I was struck at how naturally these creatures just did what they do. No fretting. No worrying about whether they should do it. No wondering what the other would think.

Each approached life very differently. The crane flew for food and ate fish. The white ibis dug deep for earth worms. And the squirrel stayed up in the tree and fed off nuts. Yet they were all at peace. They lived and did their thing cohabiting with each other. The squirrel never tried to fly and the crane did not try to pluck acorns out of the oak tree.

I began to wonder what the world would be like if we all lived our lives this way. How much peace would you have in your life right now if you just did what you were created to do? What if you got up on a Sunday morning and just accepted who you are and go about your day doing what feels natural to you?

I believe that is the natural order of things. How God created us. Just like my feathered friends, we have a distinctive purpose. What’s more, we instinctively know what we are supposed to do and how we are to do it. Problem is, we’re watching the squirrels eat nuts when we’re supposed to be grabbing fish from under the surface of the water on the fly.

CORCORAN1As you begin your day, I urge you to be who you are. Do what you were created to do. Don’t worry that you can’t walk underwater like the cormorant. Be the best YOU that you can be.

So what do you think your natural self looks like? Tell me about the authentic YOU. When you enter a new day, do you show up completely authentically you? Share it here!

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[Podcast] Episode 6: What to Do When Life Doesn’t Go According to Plan with Beth K. Vogt

Posted May 8, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

 In today’s episode, I interview novelist Beth K. Vogt.  Her second novel, Catch a Falling Star,  hit the bookstore shelves yesterday. She candidly shares about life’s story question, “What do you do when life doesn’t go according to plan?”

Author Beth K. Vogt is living her dream

Author Beth K. Vogt is living her dream

 

You can also see an interview I did with Beth on May 1, 2012, the day her first novel, Wish You Were Here, launched.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-ti0X4DRHU

 

 

 

 

 

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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30 Seconds to Live

Posted May 6, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

stopwatchImagine that you were told you only have 30 seconds to live. What would you do? Call your spouse? Kiss your children? Write a paragraph? Drop to your knees and beg for more time?

One thing’s for sure, you wouldn’t waste it doing something that doesn’t matter. No way you’d squander those precious moments. You’d live them to their fullest. Make them count.

Well, you DO only have 30 seconds to live… in a particular moment. There’s someone right there where you are who needs your help. You have what it takes to solve their problem. Yet, so often you (and I) sit there as those seconds tick by unused.

Once time has passed, you cannot get it back. The opportunity is lost. You’ll NEVER have that moment in time again.

So what should you do about it? Live each moment as if you only had 30 seconds to live. Make the most impact in that moment. Do the most good. Live that moment to its fullest.

If your clock were ticking, fear of doing something wouldn’t even enter your mind. You’d just do it. You’d ride that bull or jump out of that plane. You’d tell that person how much you love them, or give your last moment of time to enrich their lives.

You wouldn’t worry about what they thought of your actions. You’d reach out with the best of YOU.time square at night in manhattan

Time waits for no person. It ticks away, taking opportunity with it.

One of the greatest 30 seconds in my life was when I was given a diagnosis of cancer. It suddenly placed in the forefront of my mind the truth we all live with each day:

None of us is guaranteed tomorrow.

During those 30 seconds, when faced with the reality that life could evade me, I made a decision to live each moment to its fullest. I’d make a difference today more than yesterday and if I was granted a tomorrow, I’d do more. Be more.

ELDERLY WOMAN THROUGH WINDOWWhat is it that you’ve dreamed of doing but you haven’t? Maybe you were waiting for the all-illusive “someday”. Amazing how that day isn’t on the calendar. You have 30 seconds right now. Ready? Go!

What will you do with that? Live your dream, or sit idly by while the seconds rush by? I hope you grab your dream by the reigns and ride it into reality. You deserve it. The world needs it. Just do it. Now!

What would you do if you only had 30 seconds? Share it here!

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So, What Will I Do Tomorrow?

Posted May 3, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

Runner Crouching at Starting LineIn 1976, Bruce Jenner won the gold medal in the Olympic Decathlon. He spontaneously ran a victory lap, kissed his wife and basked in the moment he’d dedicated each free moment to for years.

Later that night, while champagne bottle corks popped off to honor his amazing accomplishment, Bruce sat alone in a hotel room and cried. He’d given his all to the decathlon. Every waking moment was spent in pursuit of the gold. Now that he had it, he felt strangely empty, not knowing what he would do now that he reached his goal.

He told an interviewer, “I have no plan. What will I do tomorrow?”

History is filled with individuals just like Bruce who dedicated their entire life to reach a goal, only to be left empty and void. What’s ELDERLY WOMAN THROUGH WINDOWmore, there are some who, instead of setting goals for themselves, they allowed themselves to be lead around by a leash. They have no plans. Life jerks them wherever it wants to each and every day.

We simply must take these following steps. If we don’t, in our finest hour we will sit alone and empty lamenting the question that burns in our soul: What Will I Do Tomorrow?

1)   Understand that you will most assuredly NEED another goal when you reach the one you are currently on. If you don’t have a goal, stop reading this, sit down and set a goal.

2)   Always have the next goal locked and loaded. I have notes and ideas for a book sitting ready to dive into as soon as I reach my current goal. You should always be looking into the future and letting it be a part of your thoughts and planning. When you reach the current goal, after a well-deserved rest, you’ll be ready to start your new chapter.

3)   Stop focusing on the destination. The trip is where the treasure is. Reaching the destination is great, but it’s also the end of that particular journey. If you look to the destination, the second you arrive, it’s over. If you take in all the splendor of the trip, you have wonderful memories to cherish. Not to mention a whole lot of wisdom you gained along the way.

Rocky Top Bikers MSP4)   Take time to celebrate each accomplishment. Bruce may not have thought his improvement in the javelin throw was all that huge a deal in the overall quest of the decathlon gold medal. But, I guarantee you he would not have felt so lonely, lost and empty if he’d taken the time to celebrate those milestones along the route to the victory lap.

So tell me, how would you answer if I asked you what will you do tomorrow?

Do you have a goal? A dream? Does the flame of passion for something burn brightly in your soul? Share it here. 

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Don’t Do Social Media

Posted May 2, 2013 By Reba J. Hoffman, Ph.D.

Baby Using ComputerWhen I was first told I needed to get into social media, I balked. I mean, why would anyone want to read about the fact that I got up this morning and put my contact lenses in and let the dog lick me in the mouth, or that I prefer movie theaters where I’m in charge of putting my own butter on my popcorn?

Useless, wasteful jibber-jabber. The only saving grace was that Twitter only allowed 160 characters of it. 

I fought the whole social media as a marketing tool for a long time. And with good reason. Even in a short quip, no one wants to be sold. All those companies who once spent millions to “sell” you in TV commercials have now hired social media marketers who bombard your feeds with why you should buy from them.

But, just like the interruption TV marketing, they’ve got it all wrong. As an entrepreneur, a writer, or a business owner, you shouldn’t Big Sale sign in red over white backgroundtry to sell them at all. You should try to build a relationship with them. If they like you, they’ll buy from you.  When they know and  trust you, they’ll recommend you and your books, products or services. 

Social Media is not a business task you check off your “to-do” list. If you treat it that way, those who  follow you will see right through that and will soon un-follow you. If you built up a degree of trust, you’ll quickly lose it and, once you do, it’s almost impossible to get it back.

That’s why I tell everyone; DON’T DO SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!

The key is to CONNECT with them. Learn about them. What challenges do they have? Why are they pursuing what they do? If you’re a writer, how do your readers feel? What’s going on in their world? 

Friends Photographing ThemselvesWhy do you care? Because if you don’t care, you’re doing the wrong thing with the wrong people. If you’re a writer and don’t give a hoot about those who pick up your books, do the world a favor and become a hermit. If you are a women’s coach and you don’t feel anything when they tell you about their fear, look for another profession as quickly as you can.

Technology is GREAT, but as human beings, we long for and deserve connection, not to be bombarded with sales tactics through the free medium of social media platforms. I learned this valuable lesson from my good friend, Edie Melson, author of the new book: Connections.  In fact, I feel so strongly about this message, I’m interviewing her tonight at the My Book Therapy Open House.

If you want to learn how you DON’T DO SOCIAL MEDIA, you really should come to this one hour event. I’ve learned so much from Connections CoverEdie about how to connect with friends around the world, I was transformed from a “I hate and will never do social media ever!” to a lover of connecting with those who want to make a difference in this world. 

It’s free and open to everyone, but particularly for writers and those with a dream of being a published novelist. 

Tonight: 8pmEDT: www.anymeeting.com/MBTOpenHouse1

I urge you to come and learn how to connect so you can also say: DON’T DO SOCIAL MEDIA!

Have you been marketed by companies on social media? Have you felt like doing social media would make you a cheesy cutthroat who sells knockoffs out of the trunk of your car? Share it here!

 

 

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